I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
