You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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