never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
