you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
