Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
