I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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