the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
