I just made out with a guy for $7.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Randomize
