You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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