I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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