girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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