dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
