how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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