You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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