Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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