that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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