I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize