8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize