is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Can I color on your dick again?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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