All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I have fence marks all over my body
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
