I CAN MOONWALK!
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
It was confusing and full of hummus
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
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