she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
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