Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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