How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
