We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
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