jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You've changed since you got that strap on
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
