? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
