I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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