So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
