Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
