R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
