how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
