its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
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