Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
