And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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