How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I have demons in me.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize