we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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