i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Randomize
