Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
