Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
That accounts for only three of the penises
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
