maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize