I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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