my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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