You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
