Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Tornado booty call.. dedication
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Randomize
