You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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