There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
