So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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