everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize