So drunk its hurt
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
