Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
