youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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