We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize